Best Humor Quotes

“Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car.”
― Garrison Keillor

“Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.”
― Robert A. Heinlein

“All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt.”
― Charles M. Schulz

“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye.”
― Jim Henson

“Whenever I feel the need to exercise, I lie down until it goes away.”
― Paul Terry

“I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.”
― Groucho Marx

“Be nice to nerds. You may end up working for them. We all could.”
― Charles J. Sykes